Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘hopeful’

I’m not sure if it’s COVID-19 fatigue, if it’s mental exhaustion, if it’s too many hours in front of a screen, if it’s too little hours asleep, if it’s a CFS/ME flare or just what it is…but I’m weary.

I talked to my counsellor two weeks ago and she asked how I was doing. I default to talking about work, and she always steers me back to how I am doing, outside my vocation. Outside the busy-ness of my life. And I told her I was exhausted. And she gave me the BEST advice.

You see, many of my colleagues, from both denominations, talk about being outside and active. They talk about hiking and boating, of running and kayaking…and I have difficulty finding the energy to shower. My get up and go has got up and gone.

My counsellor told me I need to rest. I need to sleep. I need to listen to my body and when my body tells me to rest, that’s what I need to do. And to stop comparing myself to my colleagues. Also excellent advice.

I’m an empath. It’s difficult to live into this reality when we are not in a time of pandemic. Besides feeling my own “stuff”, being an empath means I feel other peoples “stuff” too. In the last month I’ve had four funerals (three of them in 10 days), and many of them were very challenging.

I learned today of the death of a colleague by suicide and it broke me open. Many of the people I am in contact with in this small community I call home are struggling with mental exhaustion. A colleague framed it this way…he said mental illness is something that can be treated, while mental exhaustion is something completely different. It is something for which there is no cure or fix. And that’s exactly what I’m feeling.

I’m planning a week’s retreat time at the end of November where I’ll escape to the magical place of Away. Vinnie has been interviewing sitters and he’s found a lovely young lady (and her Mum) to order around while I’m away.

My flat is a mess. I have chores to do. And usually these chores would be done in a couple of hours. But it takes me days to do what I could do in little time. I will get it done, because I do not do well in chaos.

Tomorrow I have another appointment with my counsellor which I know will be good. And tomorrow night I’m attending a COVID compliant community event that I’ve been really looking forward to. And that means I will need to rest myself during the day so I can function to make it to the event.

These times are challenging. They are downright exhausting. But I’ll get through them. Because even though I’m weary, I’m hopeful.

And that’s got to be worth something, right?

Read Full Post »

I’ve been interested in zero-waste living for a while now. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to go completely zero-waste, yet I am making strides. One of the first things I switched over from was from plastic to bamboo toothbrushes. I used to have a subscription which delivered a new toothbrush to me every two months. Then I started figuring out how much pollution was being caused with a single toothbrush shipped every two months, as opposed to ordering six toothbrushes at a time…a year’s worth, if you will. The other day I came across bamboo toothbrushes with removable heads. That needs more investigation…

Today I took my last plastic bottle of laundry detergent to the Transfer Station for recycling. I’ve got some pods to use and then I’ll be starting laundry “strips” which are organic paper-like matter that you throw into the washing machine with your clothes and voila! I’ve been using wool dryer-balls for awhile, and I love them.

My goal is to reduce single-use plastics from my home as much as possible. With COVID-19, it’s a little bit difficult because we aren’t yet allowed to use reusable produce bags at the grocers. A benefit though, is I use the disposable produce bags when I go to the gas station.

A few months back, I switched to shampoo and conditioner bars and they are amazing. I’ve switched out body wash for artisanal soap. When I finish up the remaining face wash I’ll switch to using bar soap on my face.

This week I ordered zero-waste deodorant. It’s called “No Pong”. The name itself made me laugh out loud. The skin under my arms is very sensitive and reacts easily. I’m hoping this deodorant that I apply with my fingers will do the trick.

So now, instead of a bunch of bottles in the bathroom, I have one. Face wash. The rest are all bars. Soap, shampoo and conditioner. The razor I currently use is a metal and plastic handle with a removable/replaceable head. I don’t know that I will be able to handle a Wilkinson-style razor with razor blade…my hands shake and my balance is bad, I don’t want to inadvertently cut an artery.

In the kitchen, my storage plastics have been replaced (as they lived out their life expectancy) with glass bowls and silicone lids. I just bought a microwave popper to keep excess packaging out of the landfill/transfer station.

I use beeswax cloths instead of plastic wrap. I buy milk in glass bottles. I’m going to buy juice in a frozen concentrate rather than a plastic bottle. I use parchment paper instead of aluminum foil whenever I can.

Toothpaste. I’ve tried tooth tabs before and I can’t stand the gritty sensation. I’m not a fan of carbon toothpaste and am looking for tooth powder that is healthy for my teeth and gums and zero-waste. I don’t love brushing my teeth, so I need something that doesn’t suck…and doesn’t taste like garbage.

My cat’s litter is made from a recycled corn byproduct which makes it biodegradable. I’m still putting it in plastic bags to get it to the garbage, but I’ll figure out something to address that.

I buy pop in cans instead of plastic bottles when I’m traveling, or better yet, I bring a reusable water bottle. Again, with COVID-19, where I would bring a re-usable mug when I bought tea, they aren’t permitted currently.

I used to bring my prescription bottles back to the pharmacy for re-use, but right now that’s not allowed. So I’m amassing quite a collection. I’ll find a use for them, I’m sure of it.

One step at a time. One choice at a time. One item at a time. I’m very mindful of packaging. And of shipping. I try to buy local wherever I can, or if I need to go to the next city to buy something, I’ll combine errands to save on unnecessary trips.

With everything that is going on in the world, it may seem silly or unnecessary to be concerned with single use plastics. What I do know is I can make a difference. Even though I am one person.

I have paper towels but rarely use them. I have tissues, but also have ladies handkerchiefs which I carry when I’m out. I have washable dusting cloths and cleaning cloths. I try to buy with the least amount of pollution wherever possible. The mop I use has a removeable, washable pad.

Now, I love the dishsoap I use. And I’ve used the same bottle for the past 3 years, buying refills for it. I know there are solid bars I can use for dishes, but I’m not at that point.

I no longer colour my hair. It’s not to say that I won’t ever do it again, but right now I’m enjoying watching the Artic Blonde come in. I love the silver highlights. And I’ve earned every single one of them.

When I’m out and about if I stop for a cold drink I politely refuse the straw. I have bamboo cutlery and glass straws for when I travel.

It’s not everything, but it’s something.

Read Full Post »