I like to travel and experience new things. I like to check things out and when I go to a new place I like to use public transportation and walk wherever possible.
One of the challenges of hearing impairment is I often cannot hear airport and transit announcements. They all sound like Charlie Brown’s teacher, if you know what I mean.
Last summer I heard about a wonderful conference called Spirit Pride and it looked like an awesome opportunity to connect with folks in the LGBTQ+ community who are people of faith. Sometimes we hear that being a Queer Christian is an oxymoron. Well, it’s not.
On Friday, what would have been my Dad’s 86th birthday I drove to the next community over to fly from their airport to Vancouver. I don’t like to fly. I’m not sure what it is, but I’m not a huge fan of airplanes, which is ironic as my brother is a pilot. It is what it is.
While I’m at the airport very early I hear that the flight is delayed an hour. Instant panic. My carefully scheduled plan of how to get from the South Terminal to the Main Terminal to the Canada Line to the hotel and to the Church for the Conference is now scuppered. Heart starts racing, breathing is shallow and I find myself getting lightheaded.
I walked to the closest window and looked outside at the mountains. And concentrated on my breathing…and then I started to relax. I sat down and read my book. I negotiated with myself…”okay, if we arrive on time, I can get to the Shuttle to the Main Terminal and then find the station to get on the SkyTrain. I can check in, freshen up and take in the opening and the film screening tonight”.
As we flew I kept checking schedules and making notes. Maybe I’d have to skip checking into the hotel, could do that after the film screening. Ugh.
We landed, I got off the plane, found the exit to the terminal and there was a shuttle bus waiting. I climbed on and we drove to the main terminal. Traffic was heavy and slow. I watched the time ticking along feeling more and more anxious. Concentrated on my breathing. “you got this, you got this”.
Arrived at the main terminal. The shuttle driver pointed to where I needed to go to catch the SkyTrain and I started to relax a little. Waked to the SkyTrain terminal, bought a ticket and waited 2 minutes for the train to arrive. By my calculations I had 20 minutes to get to the Church before the opening ceremonies and the film screening.
Then I remembered it was my dad’s birthday. He’d have been 86. He was never in a hurry and seldom on time. He didn’t fight time, he flowed with it. So I made a decision, not to worry about the time, to look around and breathe. So I did.
I got off the train and started walking, realising after about 5 minutes, it was the wrong way. I laughed and asked to pet a dog. Asked directions to the hotel, and was told politely, how to get there. I looked around, smiled and asked to pet many more dogs.
Got to the hotel and the check in time was excruciating. And it was now 10 minutes after the opening had started. I gave myself permission to not attend the opening and screening. I began to focus on my breathing. And then it was my turn to check in. I found my room, turned on the air conditioner, freshened up and went for a walk to check out the neighbourhood.
I found a dog park and petted many, many dogs and chatted with many people.
Eventually I found the Church and by this time it was 8:30. I didn’t go in. I walked around that neighbourhood, found another dog part and petted many more dogs. Felt my blood pressure lessen and my heart rate drop. Felt myself relax and enjoy my surroundings.
Went for a walk back to the hotel and saw several people with needles preparing to shoot up. Said silent prayers for them, and found another way back to the hotel. Stopped at the hotel restaurant, a sports bar, and realised I was the only woman in the place. Took a seat at the bar, ordered a beer for my dad and asked for a menu. Had supper, a second beer and took another walk in a different direction. Saw the Yaletown Roundhouse platform.
Went back to my hotel room and settled in for the night.
The conference was wonderful and I enjoyed all of it. I walked whenever there was a break, to check out the neighbourhood and gave thanks that I don’t live in a big city. I don’t have to worry about heavy traffic, street lights, and too many people.
After the last session on Saturday I walked to Gastown and checked it out. Then I walked back to my hotel, taking a long way around. Enjoying the sights and sounds of the city, knowing that the next day I’d be heading home.
Sunday I got up early and checked out. Walked a different way to the Church and visited with the folks who were setting up for worship. Checked out the hymns and order of service and waited, in prayer and silence for worship to begin. It was wonderful and lasted nearly two hours.
Then I said goodbye to the organizers and Church Minister. I walked down to the sea wall, backpack on my back and made the long trip home. I arrived very early to the SkyTrain, and very early to catch the shuttle between terminals. I didn’t stress or fret because I had lots of time and a good book to read.
I walked around the outside of the terminal and petted some dogs. I walked around inside the terminal and looked at the artwork, and read some of the history of the airport.
Then I cleared security and waited to board the aircraft. I explained to the customer service rep that I don’t hear the announcements very well and he promised he’d let me know when it was coming time to board. And he did.
My car was where I left it, and I drove home as the day began to fade to night. It was a wonderful conference. I learned a lot and made some contacts. I also learned to trust myself and to let some stuff go. I’m still a nervous traveller and always will be.
I learned that I can be afraid and still do something. After all, isn’t that the definition of courage?
